13w4d OB visit

Another monthly visit on the books.  My office is sneaky about making sure you see all of the doctors - they don't bother to tell you who you'll be seeing, so you just get to be randomly shocked at whoever walks through the door.  I had Belden last time, and liked him a lot, and will continue to stubbornly call him "my" doctor.

Today I got to meet Dr. McConnell.  How shall I put this nicely?  Ick.  Baby and I were not fans.  But I'm getting ahead of myself.

Got there nice and early and sat around the waiting room, listening to the far-too-loud TV and trying not to look like an unwed teen, as I was the youngest looking mom in the room by about 10 years and the only one there without a man.  I maintain that Tom does not need to be there to watch me pee in a cup.  I'll probably bring him along way later on, when they're doing exciting things like checking for dilation and whatnot - but maybe not even then.  I'd like him to come to the anatomy ultrasound, but seeing as he didn't make it to the NT scan, my hopes aren't uber high.

Anyway, the nurse called me back, let me pee (can I please just say thank you to my office for providing GIANT, WIDE cups for this?  Thank you, office.  Some of us are terrible at the old PIAC routine.) - negative for whatever badness they're checking for, weighed me (1st tri gain of 3lbs total.  Damn.  I was hoping to skate by without a gain like those lucky jerks we all hear about but don't personally know), took my blood pressure (which has been measuring great in the office and atrocious at home/in pharmacies/in grocery stores/everywhere else old people congregate.  I have no idea, and as you're about to see, this genius was no help on anything.), and listened to the baby's heartbeat (173.  What a champ.)

So now I wait for the doctor.  Please be Belden, please be Belden, please be Belden.  Crap.  Some lady.  And her handshake sucks.  I'm judging already.  She tells me that she really has nothing to tell me.  I kind of tend to disagree, but I say this is fine, because I have questions.  A list of questions, actually.

Me: Can you please review my bloodwork with me?  I had the blood drawn while I was with another OB's practice, and then I came here, and long story short, no one has ever reviewed them with me.
Her: Oh.  Yeah.  Everything's fine.  CF and SMA tests look fine.  You're RH- but that doesn't really mean anything.
Me: Doesn't that mean a shot?
Her: oh, yeah.  A shot.  But not today.  Later.
Me: Okay, how much later?  Like, 28 weeks?
Her: yeah, that's about right.

I'm bowled over by her "explanations."  Please, not so much medical jargon.  I'm having so much trouble following you...  /eyeroll

Me: I'm having a lot of back pain
Her: oh.  why?
Me: well it's in my chart.  I have spinal issues.  I'm working with a spinal specialist, but he's not sure what he can/can't do now that I'm pregnant.  I'm totally miserable though.  He suggested injections.  Are those okay?
Her: Sure, I don't care.
Me: O-kay.  So they're medically safe?
Her: Oh sure.  You're in the second trimester.  You can do pretty much whatever.  Hey, if you need to go to the dentist, you should.
Me: um, okay.  How about epidurals?  My first OB said she didn't think I could get one because of my spinal problem.
Her: oh, they'll probably still try.
Me: I'll be honest, I'm kind of panicking at the thought of no epidural.  If it's not going to happen, I'd like to prepare ahead of time.
Her: Oh, they'll probably at least try.  Maybe they can put it in higher up! 

Thank god ONE of us cares.  It's a good thing I'm in the 2nd Tri, and can go back to shooting heroin.  Life's about to get waaaaay funner.

Me: how about this fragile X testing.  Do I need that?  It's in all these pamphlets, but my old OB didn't mention it.
Her: Nah, you're young
Me: Can you please explain what it is?
Her: (all exasperated, at this point), well, it's in the pamphlet.  I don't see why you'd do it.
Me: Yeah.  I think I'd like to do it please.
SILENCE.  She does nothing...
Me: Can you write up the order?
Her: oh.  yeah.  i don't think you need to bother, but here, take this to the lab.  It's one vial of blood.  (Lie.  2 vials.  whatever.)

Finally, I **have** to know what the NT scan theatrics were about

Me: So, did the report come in on my NT scan and bloodwork?
Her: Oh, yeah.  It's pretty much just what they told you.
Me: okay, well, no one told me anything.  Does it look okay?
Her: Oh.  Well yeah.  It's reassuring.
Me: Is reassuring good?  Can you please just say good?
Her: We call the results of those tests "reassuring"
Me: does that mean bad?
Her: no.  just "reassuring"
(I have decided at this point that I hate her)
Me: okay.  well uh, I'm... reassured.
Her: did they say boy or girl?
Me: they didn't say ANYTHING
Her: oh.  because I don't know either.  They might tell you at the 20 week scan.  Don't forget though, because they won't write it on the report.
Me: Okay.  I'll do what I can not to "forget" the gender of my first child.

Does this happen?  Seriously?

Me: Will they know if we're looking at an NTD after our 20 week scan?
Her: Yeah, they should.  Why would you even be worried?
Me: Also in my chart.  I have an NTD.
Her: Oh.  Well they're so rare in the general population, what are the chances?  I mean, you're so young...
Me: Yeah.  Well they happen.  Like, you know, to me.
Her: Yeah, you're doing great though.
Me: well, aside from living in constant pain, yeah.  I'm pretty lucky though, mine was so minor.  We're obviously concerned if the baby is at an increased risk.
Her: Why would the baby be at an increased risk?
Me: I have an NTD.
Her: Oh yeah.  Right.  Well you're so young.  I'm sure it's fine.

I'm starting to wonder how young my chart says that I am.  Is 26 really that obscenely young as pregnant women go?

I had other questions, but decided to abandon them.  This doctor is a waste of my time and is not helping to reassure me at all.  I want Belden back. 

Fast forward 6 months.  I swear, this idiot will end up delivering my child.

My next appointment is in 4 weeks, at 17w4d.  At that point we can TALK about scheduling my anatomy scan.  Great.  I'll be 25 weeks before we get this thing done.

The only good part, aside from my baby's rockstar heartbeat, was that the Ultrasound tech from earlier this week, who scared the living daylights out of me, is getting written up.  I'm kind of unenthused about going back there for my 20w scan.  But what can you do?